Love Isn’t Cancelled––But it Might be Virtual 

Most brides spend a lifetime planning for their wedding. Between the guest list, the venue, the silverware, the programs, the flowers, and the photographer, no detail gets overlooked. What the thousands of summer 2020 brides hadn’t penciled into their wedding planners was the arrival of a potentially fatal virus that would sweep across the nation and prohibit all social gatherings.  

Some brides coped with the arrival of this unwelcome wedding guest by postponing their nuptials until the virus could no longer pose a threat. Other brides decided to get creative and put modern technology to good use through a virtual wedding.  

Kara Stickney, a 26-year-old software consultant living in the Bay Area, was eager to marry her college sweetheart, even if it meant sacrificing the traditional bridal experience. She and her fiancé tied the knot on May 1 in an intimate backyard ceremony, officiated by an ordained family member via zoom, and witnessed by an audience of just ten attendees sitting six feet apart. While it may have been a bit unconventional, Stickney says that the stripped-down version of her wedding allowed her “to focus on what was really important about that day.” 

Now, as a seasoned veteran of the virtual wedding realm, she offers future brides the four most important tips to keep in mind for their special day: 

Pick a Reliable Platform  

Modern technology is the best it has ever been with high-resolution phone cameras, portable tablets, and lightning speed internet, but still, it has its limitations. That is why it is important to pick a dependable service that won’t crash mid- “I Do.” Stickney says, “We chose Zoom, which worked great.”  

Have a Dress Rehearsal 

When having a virtual wedding, understand that not everyone works at the Genius Bar for Apple, and there may be some people who struggle with operating the given technology. A rehearsal beforehand alleviates some of the stress of tech issues on the day of. “Even with our rehearsal, it was difficult to make sure everyone felt comfortable using the platform. Practice, practice, practice!” 

Set Realistic Expectations 

No little girl pictures her wedding day with a webcam for a witness, but the change in format does not make it any less special––it just makes it different than anticipated. Therefore, it is best to adjust your expectations accordingly. Stickney recommends, “Instead of focusing on all the things it’s not, focus on everything that it is. It’s a day to celebrate your love and commitment to each other.” 

Take Care of the Legal Stuff 

Even if you get dressed up, say your vows, and seal the deal with a kiss, if you have not completed the required legal documentation ahead of time, it is just a virtual party, not a virtual wedding. Therefore, to be seen as a married couple in the eyes of the state, “get everything sorted out legally as far in advance as possible. Policies are changing constantly to adapt our lives according to COVID, that you’ll want to make sure everything is sorted legally before the big day. This was a big stressor for us, and doing the research ahead of time can save a headache!” 

As the number of Coronavirus cases continues to skyrocket within the U.S., the trend of virtual weddings may become increasingly popular in the coming year. However, happy couples like Stickney and her new husband demonstrate that marriage can begin via Zoom as long as love is present—and a willingness to teach the grandparents how to make conference calls.